Single = Taboo?

All my life, I grew up being single. Not because boys don’t like nor me that way. Actually, I’m an ugly duckling throughout middle and high school. Boys find me disgusting. They always run in opposite direction. At the same time, I didn’t really care. My parents, who are amazingly strict, wouldn’t allow me to date because they felt that I was too young. Middle and high school to them is all about focusing on getting excellent grades and applying to big fancy Universities. So yes, I got used to the “No Boyfriend until you’re 23” rule. Even guy friends are considered a boyfriend. My mom used to argue with me that boys will always be boys. If you reject them, they will come to your door and murder down your family. Honestly, that is just load of crap. I have met amazing guys that are like my brothers. I don’t think they’re the type to go down and crack into the psychopath they’re not.

After I graduated and turned 18, my mom started lecturing me about dating life in college. The most used sentence I would hear is “Get a boyfriend”. I understand college means you’re an adult and it’s appropriate for you to get out there ; hopefully you’ll find that one true mate you’re meant to be with. At 18, I still consider myself a youngster. I didn’t want a boyfriend just yet. To me, before you get into a relationship, you have to find out who you are as an individual and learn to take care of yourself before you can take care of others. It’s the number one advice I would give to my single friends. Then again, I see a bunch of acquaintances on my Facebook, reposting single memes indicating how single they are. I don’t know if they repost because it’s true or they find it denying satisfy that someone out there is going through the same.

I personally have a neutral opinion about being single or in a relationship. I like being single, but I also don’t mind being stuck with one person for a while. I believe in commitment and monogamous relationships. But when I date someone, I’m not that type of girl that tries to scare every guy in my path about marriage and stuff. Because I would know if my guts are telling me if that guy is meant to be with me. I had talked/dated a few people in college. Every time, I mention about wanting a long term relationship, those guys would run in the opposite direction. I’m pretty glad that I’m not with those guys because it tells me that I deserve someone who’s more upstanding. It took a while with all the heartaches and the constant “You’ll find someone” phase. Now I’m a 24 year old with a wonderful amazing boyfriend that a girl could ask for. What I’m trying to say is if you’re happy being single, then be single. Go out. Have a drink or two. Get drunk till you drop. Nothing wrong with being single. Maybe someday that someone special will sweep off your feet. Before you know it, you’ll forget all those disappoints and heartaches. Just don’t whine and post memes. Cause some of us are annoyed.


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25 year old Chinese American with an English Degree.

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