I was going to the bathroom to do my business when my mom stopped me. She then showed me a video of a young Chinese girl from Harvard singing. Everyone (in my culture) commented how smart and beautiful she is. To me, it doesn’t seem real. Because the video was too loud and the voice isn’t hers. Genuinely, when people film themselves singing, the music wouldn’t be too loud and they’re not lip syncing. But I’m not focusing on that. I think my mom is trying to get me to be all impressed because she’s from Harvard and talented.
Please. I’ve watched videos of America’s Got Talent and those people are 10x talented than the Harvard Chinese girl. Plus, her education isn’t worth bragging about. Sure, it’s great that she got there through on her own terms. But nothing worth bragging about. Just because their GPA excelled through academic success doesn’t mean they’re smart in life. GPA doesn’t tell anyone’s future. I know people who don’t excel in school, but they turn out to be the most intelligent people I ever met. The ones that do excel in school sucks at life. I’m not saying it goes for everyone. But sometimes it’s true.
Asian parents in general love to brag about their kids. Whenever an honor roll or announcement of going to Harvard comes home, they’ll do anything to win the battle of bragging. It’s how it is in my family. I heard multiple stories of my 2nd cousins’ success on my maternal side. I careless about their academic success. Success is not about competition, but a journey. I rather brag about my best friend’s improvement from high school to college. I can name the people that graduated from community college and are transferring to a good University. One of my best guy friends didn’t receive a college degree, but he’s now a promising writer who’s book will be published. Those are the stories I want to hear.
I don’t want Harvard or Top Surgeon of the country story. It’s never appealing. I remember a couple years ago, I was waiting for my bus ride. There’s these two grandmothers, speaking in Cantonese. I understand and speak on some levels. When they saw me, they try speaking in slow English. I looked at them all weird and told them I speak Cantonese. They went into complete shocked and were amazed that I spoke the language since the next generation doesn’t. After telling them my age and education career, one of them spoke of her grandson in UCLA, majoring in -insert fancy degree-. I don’t know what she was doing, but it seems to be she’s using her grandson as a brag to get me impressed.
Unfortunately, I don’t buy it. Grades and GPA are not part of getting to know people package. When it comes to dating scene, Asians tend to look for status and money. It’s an important key for approval. If you have both, you are welcome no matter if you’re an ass or not. I’ve met guys that my mom will definitely approve, however, I have no chemistry with these people. Between grades and money, I got bored talking to them. Sure, I want to know what your future plans are. But never brag your success in front of me. I’m not in a relationship for status. That’s one of the reasons why I have so much difficulty in dating. There’s hardly anyone I want to connect on a genuine feeling. Luckily, I finally found someone who isn’t all about money and grades. I rather have that connection than finding out what’s the status.